The Internet's newest money drainer is now open. A couple dozen people registered a domain, but we'll tell you 400,000.

.FÔNI domain names are available for all uses, be it porn sites, get-rich-quick schemes, or more porn sites. Intuitive (it can do your taxes for you!), easy to use (type .com, realize your website is stupid, backspace and type .fôni), and universally recognized by both the WWF and the Women League of Bowlers.

Afiliass is the official .FÔNI registry, appointed by ICANT, the non-profit monopoly that keeps fucking up.